Hoo boy – sound familiar? I so clearly remember taking care of everyone else because that was what a good wife/mother/employee/homeowner does. I never had time to do anything that would make my heart sing. I was too mature for that, had too many responsibilities, and was very busy doing ‘a good job’. After all, I wasn’t a kid anymore; in fact, I had a child of my own.
I forgot how to play. How sad is that?
When I was teaching a marathon clinic, one of the fellows in the clinic told me that, as he was running, he was starting to feel so much better about himself. “More relaxed, happier”, he mused to me. In another chat, he was reminiscing about playing the drums throughout high school and college, and how he had loved it. At the end of the clinic, he turned to me and announced: “I bought myself a set of drums!” His delight was apparent. He had reconnected to a past passion that he had re-discovered once he focused on his needs.
It ain’t easy as a wife/husband/ mother/father to claim time and space for your needs. But if we don’t do that for ourselves, we start to disappear into the service of others. If we don’t make the time to have fun, relax and play, then life becomes a resentful drudge. When we look at health as a whole comprised of mind, body, soul it’s that last one that often drops off the page.
As I lost my weight, a desire to sing again began to niggle at me. I had been in choirs and musical revues in high school, and had sung at some weddings too. But that had been about 25 years ago, and I had forgotten how to read music, so those thoughts were soon swept aside to make room for my to do list. But the desire to sing just wouldn’t let go, and I eventually joined a choir. I carved precious time out of my busy schedule as I re-discovered a passion for singing and music.
When I joined that choir, my heart started to sing again, literally. I won’t lose sight of the power of playing again, because it feeds my soul.